Respect and Suspect

Rabbi Reuven Mann

In this week's parsha, Toldot, we read about the birth of twin sons to Rivkah.  Generally, there is a great deal of similarity among twins.  However, Eisav and Yaakov could not have been more different from each other.  Yaakov was a (pure) person who "dwelled in tents."  The meaning of this statement is that he spent his time in the "Beit Medrash" studying Torah and wisdom, day and night.  On the other hand, Eisav was an expert hunter, an outdoorsman.  The parents did not share the same attitude toward their children.  Yitzchak loved Eisav, because the "hunt was in his mouth: and Rivka loved Yaakov."  

At first glance the reason for Yitzchak's love of Eisav is not easy to understand.  Rashi explains that Eisav practiced the art of deception with his father.  He would come to him with all types of shailot (questions of Jewish law) e.g. how does one tithe salt and straw, which gave Yitzchak the impression that his older son was very meticulous in mitzvot.  Rivka, however, was apparently unimpressed.  She came from a family and culture of "deceivers".  Her brother, after all, was the great con man Lavan.  She knew that there were people whose entire religiosity was geared exclusively to making an impression on others.  Eisav was in the field all day where no one could observe his true behavior.  Anyone is capable of being on good conduct for short periods of time.  Yaakov however spent all of his time engaged in study and the pursuit of knowledge.  That type of dedication cannot be manufactured to impress people.  The Rabbis say "Respect him and suspect him."  We should treat people with consideration but should not be overly impressed by outward appearances of righteousness.  We should always retain an element of suspicion until we can ascertain that a person is genuinely upright.  And we should be just as suspicious about ourselves.  We should honestly examine if the good deeds we do are essentially to impress others.  There is nothing wrong with "seeking credit" and a pat on the back but we must also foster a genuine love of Hashem and a desire to the good when only He is watching.

Shabbat Shalom