Ishmael: A Life of Contention

Rabbi Moshe Ben-Chaim & Dani Roth

What is Ishmael’s role? His Egyptian mother Hagar displayed poor character, as she became competitively arrogant towards her mistress Sarai (Sarah), for Hagar conceived from Abram immediately, while Sarai could not conceive even after 10 years of marriage to Abram (Abraham). Hagar viewed her pregnancy as a sign of worthiness. Such baseless interpretation as worthy was a character flaw which Sarai deemed requiring correction. God agreed, but then plans a nation from Hagar’s son Ishmael who will embody that very competitive flaw. Let’s read the verses:

Sarai, Abram’s wife, had borne him no children. She had an Egyptian maidservant whose name was Hagar. And Sarai said to Abram, “Behold, God has kept me from bearing. Have relations with my maid; perhaps I shall be built up through her.” And Abram heeded Sarai’s request. So Sarai, Abram’s wife, took her maid Hagar the Egyptian—after Abram had dwelt in the land of Canaan ten years—and gave her to her husband Abram as concubine. He cohabited with Hagar and she conceived; and when she saw that she had conceived, Hagar looked down upon Sarai her master.

And Sarai said to Abram, “The wrong done me is your fault! I myself put my maid in your bosom; now that she sees that she is pregnant, I am lowered in her esteem. God should judge between me and you. Abram said to Sarai, “Your maid [Hagar] is in your hands. Deal with her as you think right.” Then Sarai treated her harshly, and she ran away from her. 

An angel of God found her by a spring of water in the wilderness, the spring on the road to Shur, and said, “Hagar, slave of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?” And she said, “I am running away from my mistress Sarai.” And the angel of God said to her, “Go back to your mistress, and subjugate yourself to her treatment.” And the angel of God said to her, “I will greatly increase your offspring, and they shall be too many to count.” The angel of God said to her further, “Behold, you are pregnant and shall bear a son; you shall call him Ishmael, for God has heard your suffering. He shall be a wild man: his hand will be against everyone, and everyone’s hand will be against him. He shall dwell in the face of all this brothers.” 

And she called God who spoke to her “You are the God I see” for she said, “Even here I have seen (God) after already seeing” (Him). Therefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi; it is between Kadesh and Bered. Hagar bore a son to Abram, and Abram gave the son that Hagar bore him the name Ishmael. Abram was eighty-six years old when Hagar bore Ishmael to Abram. (Gen. 16:1-16).

We would expect God’s recognition of an affliction to be met with good news. Here it is not: 

God has heard your suffering. You will have a son who shall be a wild man: his hand will be against everyone, and everyone’s hand will be against him. He shall dwell in the face of all this brothers.

God tells Hagar her son will attack mankind. And surprisingly, Hagar agrees to this plan by returning to Sarai. Furthermore, what is God’s plan for Ishmael? 

Rabbi Israel Chait expounded wonderfully on this portion (https://www.mesora.org/intrinsicworthiness.html). He explained that Hagar looked down upon Sarai as she immediately conceived, while Sarai had not conceived even after 10 years. Hagar was motivated by an idolatrous, superstitious belief: “Good fortune (conception) supernaturally indicates fate is favoriting me.” Sarai reprimanded Abram for not responding to Hagar’s corrupt philosophy. Abram agreed he was wrong for not doing so and told Sarai to treat Hagar appropriately. Sarai then overworked Hagar, thereby exposing Hagar’s view as false, as she in fact was subject to negativity and not favoritism, which should have shielded her from Sarai’s afflictions. Sarai put Hagar’s belief to the test, and her belief failed. 

Hagar followed emotions of competition, a poor value system. Had she acted properly, Hagar should have accepted the pregnancy without any assessment of Sarai’s worth. But as she followed competitive emotions, and feeling favorited, she looked down upon Sarai. Sarai’s ensuing affliction drove Hagar to flee.

God tells an angel to address Hagar; something crucial must be going on for God to do so. God tells the angel to address Hagar as “slave of Sarai.” Meaning, God wants Hagar to focus on her capacity as a servant. That is, God wants Hagar’s subordinate relationship to remain and therefore instructs the angel to direct Hagar back to Sarai and sustain her subjugation to her: “Go back to your mistress, and subjugate yourself to her treatment.” God, Abram, Sarai and eventually Hagar herself all agreed this subjugation was appropriate to correct Hagar’s misinterpretation: good or bad fortune does not conclusively indicate whether a person is on a high or lower level. One cannot interpret natural events as a sign of anything, as one does not know God's mind.

What other good was served by Hagar returning? 

And the angel of God said to her, “Go back to your mistress, and subjugate yourself to her treatment.” And the angel of God said to her, “I will greatly increase your offspring, and they shall be too many to count.” The angel of God said to her further, “Behold, you are pregnant and shall bear a son; you shall call him Ishmael, for God has heard your suffering. He shall be a wild man: his hand will be against everyone, and everyone’s hand will be against him. He shall dwell in the face of all this brothers.” 

God desired Ishmael serve a lesson to mankind. God wished Hagar’s incorrect competitive philosophy be embodied throughout time. God’s naming of the son Ishmael means God “heard” Hagar’s affliction, meaning He recognized Hagar’s problem being competitive that evoked Sarai’s affliction. God told Hagar her son will embody this life of contention with all men, and Ishmael already showed negative behavior in Abraham’s home (Gen. 21:9). Hagar recognized her flaw and therefore accepted God’s plan to correct mankind, explaining why she returned to Sarai. God wished a people descend from Ishmael who are preoccupied with competing with all others, and are intolerable, as Ishmael has become over the millennia: “He shall be a wild man: his hand will be against everyone, and everyone’s hand will be against him.” God does not interfere in free will. When the angel says that Hagar’s son Ishmael will be wild and will raise his hand against everyone, the angel is stating what her son and his descendants will decide of their own free will. Hagar’s descendants will embody Hagar’s poor quality expressed in despising Sarai: competition with others. His descendants will follow this wrong preoccupation, and we see that Ishmael soon became a robber (Rashi; Gen. 21:20). Rabbi Israel Chait taught, “If a person doesn’t do teshuva, these matters are ingrained into the personality, and it’s not just that generation that suffers from it, but the next generation. One imperfection promotes another, and it perpetuates itself. So maybe that’s why it expresses itself in future generations” (“Genesis” book I, page 264).  

What is so crucial about this lesson? Our purpose is to be preoccupied not with man, but with God, where social status and human acceptance is of no concern. Ishmael will become a lesson to mankind that contention is the incorrect life, as no one will tolerate Ishmael for “everyone’s hand will be against him” in response. God desires this intolerability be on display.

Hagar first caved in to her conflict with Sarai and fled. But she followed God’s angel and exemplified perfection by overcoming her conflict and subjugating herself to God’s will. His will is that Ishmael exist and flourish into a nation that displays the improper life of contending with man, of following petty emotions of rivalry and domination. God wished Hagar to choose between an emotional life seeking avoidance of interpersonal grief, and between following God’s will of educating mankind. Hagar rose to the occasion, she accepted the grief and subjugation under Sarai, and accepted her son’s role to teach man this very lesson. 

“Remove yourself from man, whose soul is in his nostrils, for what worth s man?” (Isaiah 2:22). Here, the prophet appeals to man to abandon seeking approval from mortals, a lifestyle most people find hard to leave. People live primarily for ego satisfaction, and ego depends on how man thinks his friend views him. Our strivings for beautiful homes, cars, clothes and extravagant affairs are all attempts to gain peer approval. And on a global scale, the competitive emotion is at the heart of the world’s major conflicts starting with wars. Ishmael teaches a most crucial lesson.

Isaiah instructs man to abandon competition, and turn to Torah and seek God instead, the life that man truly finds deep satisfaction. In the future, all peoples will recognize God’s Torah as truth, and human conflict will end.